Heart-Breaking Stories

Last Friday, while wrapping up my work, I looked at our tv to see what's on CNN. The TV is normally in a low volume so I didn't really hear what it was all about. All I saw were these cute doggies in cages - shitzu, dalmatian, siberian husky, some medium sized fluffy dog, etc. So I dropped the papers I was holding and reached for the remote control. I turned on the volume and a japanese was explaining: "My job is supposed to save their lives. But what can I do? this is the law". Then the reporter said: "in a week, if these dogs are not claimed, they will be euthanized..."

Did I hear the person being interviewed and the reporter right? Are they seriously going to kill these dogs?

I didn't want to know but being a dog lover, I wanted to know if the dogs are ok. I continued watching.

Then the reporter said that it has been a week since they filmed the previous scenes and until now, no one has claimed any of the dogs. They showed how a guy guided the dogs to this chamber - some fought for their lives, some where just plainly obedient and some where even excited (perhaps thinking they were going for a walk). Then they were "gassed". A couple of minutes later, the reporter said they all died and new batch of dogs just came in the pound.

The anchor man explain that it was a really diffucult report to show but they had to. They said Japan and the US are one of the countries where there are high rates of dog euthanasia. Most countries in Europe like Italy, France, Switzerland, etc. have ZERO cases of dog euthanasia - dog euthanasia is illegal in most countries in Europe.

Also last week, they also reported that Chinese government has officially banned the selling of dog and cat meats.

Last Thursday, while doing my laundry, this old man came in with a seriously huge german shepherd without a leash! The old man was walking very slowly with his back bent low. The german shepherd was just looking at the old man and patiently walking the same pace as him. The old man put on his clothes to the washing machine and dropped some coins. When the machine was running, he whispered to his dog. The dog laid down in front of the machine and the old man went out of the laundry shop. There were three of us (excluding german sheppy) inside the laundry shop and we were all looking at the german sheppy. At some point, we realized that we were all looking at the german sheppy so we looked at one another in amazement and smiled. After 20-30 minutes, the old man came back with 2 small bottles of water - he gave the other one to german sheppy. Once the old man was done with the laundy, he packed up and blurted some in french to german sheppy. The dog stoop up and walked with the old man. We all noticed that that the old man mind is having a hard time carrying his laundry bag this time bec he didn't tumble dry his clothes therefore they were heavier. I don't know if it was just me for german sheppy was uneasy - walking while literally looking at the old man. So the guy behind me offered help. The old man accepted.

There a lot of touching stories out there how dogs really helped people in a lot of ways so seeing that CNN special report just broke my heart.

When in Doubt, Go Back to Basics!

I had an early appointment with my bank this morning at the WHO building so I decided to have my cappuccino and pain au chocolat (my breakfast combo nowadays) at their café. While having my breakfast, I had a strange conversation with a Filipino. Apparently, we’ve already met once that’s why she recognized me. Aside from that, my landlady baby sits her daughter during the day.

So we talked about how many Filipinos are there in different UN agencies, roll call of the names of the Filipinos working in WHO and for me say if I know them or not, how difficult it is to get an apartment in Geneva, etc. Then all of a sudden, our conversation went to this:

Joan : Sabi nga pala ni Eli (my landlady) Christian ka daw. Nakahanap ka na ba ng church? May dati kasing taga WHO na kaibigan ko na mormons. Pwede kitang i-endorse dun
Icar : meron na po. thanks for the offer.
Joan : Hindi ka ba laki sa Pilipinas?
Icar : Laki po.
Joan : Ah, bakit ka Christian? Uso na ba satin yun ngayon?
Icar : ummm… (yes, there was a pause) alam ko na ate Joan, lunch tayo tapos kwentuhan kita dyan.
Joan : Ay sige, sige! Lunch tayo para ma-meet mo din yung mga ibang Filipinos dito nag mamadali din kasi ako.

When I got home, Joan was in our apartment picking up her daughter. She reminded me about our lunch.

I’ve always been prepared in answering questions about my faith, about Jesus, about being a Christian, etc. But being asked if being a Christian is now a trend in our country in the context of me being a Christian is something that I must say: I did not see that one coming! So in 3-5 seconds, I thought of these (that was long the pause was):

1. I can’t explain this in 1 sentence because she was obviously in a hurry
2. How do I answer her without sounding like I’m preaching to her or without her thinking that I’m being self righteous?
3. She obviously doesn’t know about the term “Christian” so giving her a quick answer is prone to misconception
4. I don’t know anything about her therefore I might say something that might offend her.

I was like: “Lord, what do I say?!” Then I went back to the basics of one to one and small groups: build relationships first! Thus, instead of answering her question, I asked her to have lunch with me.

Fighting The Wrong Fight

Bad trip talaga ‘tong taong ‘to! Pasalamat sya at Christian ako kung hindi papatulan ko talaga yan! ARGHHHH!

That would be me in a real life situation. You see, my temper has always been my struggle probably since birth. When I became a Christian that was the first thing I had to deal with. I have to admit, it’s not easy and I’m still struggling. For the past three years, I managed to control my temper by not being confrontational. I learned to let go of things that will only “fuel the fire”. Again, it’s not easy that there are still times that I just lose it.

“Love your enemies” is probably one of the most popular teachings in the bible and acknowledged as fairly difficult by all. As Christians, I think it is safe to say that it is easy for us to pray for our enemies. However, once they are right in our face, hitting on our nerves, what do we do?

This often brings me to the question: how do I love my enemy then? Is just walking away enough? Because when I walk away and even pray for that person, the next time I see that person I’m pretty sure I still I haven’t forgotten the reason why I was pissed with him/her.

So how to I love my enemies? Technically, I know the answer: avoid confrontation, do good to them and pray for them. Here’s the thing, I can avoid confrontation, do good things to them and pray for them yet continue to hate them. So does that meet the criteria of loving your enemy?

Yesterday, I was surprised that it was a 27-year old Pastor who answered that question. In his t-shirt, shorts and slippers, Pastor Seth (I think that’s his name) passionately preached about persecution. One of the points was “loving your enemies”. He pointed out that once you see a person as an enemy, no matter how much respect you give that person, there will always be a part of you that will think that he/she was/is your enemy.

Pastor Seth said to look beyond the person. Because whatever that person did to you, it was not him/her who actually did it. That person is just being used by Satan against you – so that your heart will be tainted with hatred. Human beings are not capable of inflicting pain, hurt, anger, hatred, etc. on you. It is their actions, decisions, words, etc. that do those. Those are Satan’s and he knows that the easiest way to get to you is through another person by influencing their actions, decisions, words, etc. And when you start hating that person, you become vulnerable to Satan as well. He then can now use you so that the other person can feel more hatred towards you making this an ultimate man vs. man fight. Well, the truth is this isn’t a human vs. human fight. This should be a fight against evil. We should be instruments of God in fighting evil, not instruments of Satan in spreading evil.

Ephesians 6:12 For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against might powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits.

I know some people might read this and would go: “whatever!” or would think I’m losing it. But I’m posting this anyway because the more we think the word “evil” only exists in movies or books…that “evil” is fiction…the more we will turn on against one another. Then the more the “love your enemy” commandment in the bible becomes unattainable.

No Checking of Facebook in the Office for Now

Peter: Good Morning Icar!
Icar: (sobbing) Oh hi Peter.
Peter: hey, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?
Icar: nothing, don’t mind me please. This is embarrassing.
Peter: Are you sure you’re ok? Are you sick?
Icar: no, these are happy tears. Something great happened yesterday for my friends in Manila and I’m just so happy and proud of them.
Peter: so, you’re homesick? That’s ok. No need to be embarrassed. That’s normal
Icar: I’m not normal. Sorry, I mean I don’t get homesick. I miss people but I don’t get homesick. Really…promise, these are happy tears
Peter: ok, ok. If you need anything, I’m just in my office.
Icar: thanks *slightly laughing*

After a couple of minutes, 3 more people (who already greeted me a good morning) passed by to say “good morning” to me and of course checked if I’m doing okay. Grrrr! Hold on people! For your information, in my six years with IOM, I only cried twice (excluding this episode) and those were because I was too angry for so long that I couldn’t contain it. Anyway, what’s with my morning drama? I love my family, my friends and my doggies back home and I miss you all so much but yes, I am enjoying here and excited as I may have found the reason why I am here (that’s another story). I cried because of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E_cIn1DSgaQ

When I learned that Val and the KIDS worship team are playing at the music museum, I got so excited! In fact, it was only the 1,383.76 US Dollars ticket that kept me from flying to Manila just to see this.

The other Sunday I thought about my teammates the whole day! Of course it didn’t help that earlier that week Val mentioned that they might have a shortage of volunteers that Sunday. I was somehow appeased after a great message from Pastor Matthias and when later on was told by Val that it went well. I’m so proud of my team.

Last Friday Val, told me that he’s on leave because he needed to rest and because they have a practice for this Sunday’s praise and worship. I was ecstatic! I completely forgot that this coming Sunday was KIDS “MM launch”. From then on, I couldn’t help but think how Val and the rest of the KIDS Worship Team are doing. Are they ready? Do they have a Saturday practice?

Sunday came and believe it or not, the KIDS Worship team was the first thing in my mind. It also didn’t help that Pastor Mattias was preaching through video because he was visiting a church in Kiev. I was distracted the whole time. Then Val sent me a message saying that all went well. After attending church, I spent the rest of the day waiting for updates at Facebook. I was extremely happy when I saw the posts from friends on how God’s presence was really felt through the KIDS Worship team. Just by reading the posts and looking at the photos, I had goosebumps already so what more for the people who were there.

This morning, the first thing I did was to check if someone has already posted a video. True enough, Val did! And when the video started playing, for some freaking reason, I started crying! Trust me, I didn’t want to. The weird thing is, I couldn’t stop! I was already telling myself that this is totally embarrassing and if someone sees me, it will be the end of my reputation! Haha! So that’s when Peter saw me.

I’m too emotional when it comes to KC I guess it’s because I’ve seen it grow. I’ve seen the hard work and dedication of every person in this ministry, especially Pastor Larry, and I’ve witness how God has blessed this family. I can also say that a significant part of where I am right now with my walk with God is because of this ministry. This is where I learned what “whatever it takes” means.

Congratulations again to Pastor Larry, Kuya Jun and the rest of the KIDS Worship Team. I am so proud of you and I can’t wait for your international debut! To my teammates, I miss you all!

So right now, just to avoid embarrassing tears, I won't be checking my facebook while in the office at all! (except when post this) I will look on people's posts, pictures and videos of yesterdays praise and worship when I in my room in my apartment. :)